Organized PPC Club 83

Became the organizer of various PPC digital marketing initiatives, collectively known as the Hellbent projects: the PPC Club 83 – the private PPS Slack community; PPC Certification; and Alcohol and Advertising, for a few examples. If you have a weird sense of humor and know digital marketing, you may enjoy my series of columns on How would the great philosophers do PPC/digital marketing, and lessons on PPC & digital marketing from song lyrics.

Launched “Client Horror Stories” Podcast

What more fun way to meet interesting people than to deep-dive into challenging client situations they’ve been in, and what they learned and should have done differently.What more fun way to meet interesting people than to deep-dive into challenging client situations they’ve been in, and what they learned and should have done differently. Some insane stories indeed–clients can be krazy to manage! Listen to some at Client Horror Stories, launched on April 4th.

‘Beloved by Clients’ published, exposing the open secret of client work

The book was finally published—my guide to making clients love working with you—launched, exposing the open secret of client work: what makes clients happy isn’t just the results of your work. Rather, it’s how you work: how you communicate, how fast you respond, how you deal with mistakes you’ll make, how you deal with delays or mistakes others make, how you take ownership or pass the buck, how you turn work into processes, how organized and structured you are, how transparent you are, how you tell them what they don’t want to hear or shirk away from doing so, and so forth. PS: check out the book!

‘A Drunken Philosopher on Oh, The Places You’ll Go!’ Published

As my writing gets my esoteric and mystical—as I get more esoteric and mystical!—my latest book is out, where I go line by line through a silly children’s book, and find the depth in every little detail of it… and my analysis goes into some surprising directions. The subtitle says it all: “A Deep-Dive Into A Seemingly Light But Secretly Deep Masterpiece.” You can get a copy here.

Became UV’s CMO, FTW

I began leading growth for UV. Figuring out how to land million dollar dev contracts has been quite the adventurous ride. I’ve been loving it and conquering it! Update: We did it! We sold it to Argano!

Published the Scorpion & the Frog

I spent a weekend writing up 29 versions of the classic fairy tale. Same story and same facts each time; but in each, the backstory before it happened & the thoughts in each of their heads change–resulting in a very different story each time. Fun, light, tons of hidden Easter egg gifts for the readers – and each one reinforcing that whenever I see someone behaving in a way that makes no sense to me, I need to ask myself, “what does he know that I don’t?” Read it and then let me know what you think.

The Buffalo Group

On June 5th, I was appointed Non-Executive Chairman of The Buffalo Group, the Latin American political consultancy.

Began Instagramming

@smorganfriedman–with neither selfies nor food.

Founded Checkraise

Ask me about it. Checkraise built the most modern poker technology on the market — including the first in-browser, real-money, fully legal poker game. And it gave me an excuse to spend most of my time in São Paulo for a few years and learn Portuguese.

Began Tweeting

@morganfriedman but heed the warning in my Twitter bio: I know a ton about a tiny number of topics; nothing about anything else. Each of my observations here is obvious, trivial, or wrong.

Began Noting Spanish Etymologies

Spanish Etymology: Spanish for Nerds. I am obsessed with understanding where words come from, in many languages–and connecting the dots. My passion since I was 8 years old. For fun, I turned my decades of notes into a blog, with tens of thousands of subscribers. Get the book, as well.

Founded Tinak: Aramaic Art

Created the market for modern art ketubahs, taking ancient Aramaic texts and using them in modern art. Led the company to profitability, and built a fantastic and loyal community around our art and style. Now I’m Chairman–just because that makes me sound important!

Ran Marketing Services @ Procentris

Procentris. Procentris’ of Online Marketing Services, managing the online marketing for its US SEO & SEM clients. In Bombay. Managing dozens of SEOs & SEMs while in India = Premature White Hairs. I tried, and not for me!

Keynoted Interesting New York

I love this speech I gave, about my idiosyncratic way of walking around cities. (It starts out slow the first ~4 minutes… but stick it out for 13 minutes, it gets awesome as I get into the groove.)

Began WNIP: Wednesday Night Interesting People

WNIP. Every Wednesday since 2008, the best people I know in the country would come to my house for drinks. (Except for interludes when I’m abroad or in intense-focus mode.) Often includes very, very awesome people.

Won a Presidential Election

As CEO of The Marketing Scientist, I ran the digital for Álvaro Colom Caballeros’ candidacy for the Presidency of Guatemala. We won.

Founded The Marketing Scientist on 27/7

The Marketing Scientist. Started an applied psychology lab: figuring out how to get 1+ million people buying your product. I’ve done it a few times :)

Penguin Published My Two Books

Buy the book, Overheard in New York. I’ve written two books–both Top 10 best-sellers on Amazon, and both published by Penguin. And buy the sequel, Overheard in the Office.

Founded Overheard in New York

Overheard in New York. Founded a humor empire with my (successful!) mission to get 10 million people to laugh at my jokes. Time Magazine‘s Coolest Blogger of the Year. Endless Media Attention: my 15 minutes of fame. (And our sister sites, incl. Overheard in the Office).

Began Wordcounter

Wordcounter. Founded the first & leading site to count the number of words in a document. Sold and exited, thank you very much!

Was Senior Analyst @ Basex

Basex. Analyst, then Senior Analyst, then VP of Research at Basex. Focusing on Knowledge Management research.

Founded Tripsmith

My very first company: one of the first print-on-demand systems. Got lucky.

Began the Inflation Calculator

Inflation Calculator. Began the first & most visited site to calculate the US inflation rate.

Began the Cliche Finder

Cliche Finder. Began the first & most popular searchable database of cliches. I don’t hide my love of cliches.

Was Graduated from the University of Pennsylvania

Penn, the Low Ivy. Won the Alumni Society Award as one of the 10 best students of my year. Won the Lilian & Benjamin Levy Award for writing, too. And yes, I’m a pretentious grammar snob for saying “was graduated” rather than “graduated.” I also use the Oxford Comma.

Began Westegg on 9/11 (no, not that year)

When still a baby bopper, I founded my first site & bought my first domain on date that most people remember for some other reason that happened a few years later.

Discovered ‘The Net’ and Made Some of the Very Early Interesting Pages

I discovered ‘the Net’ (information superhighway?) and had lots of ideas for web pages–and taught myself programming, made them, and years later, they still get a ton of traffic. There are many, but here are a bunch, for Memory’s Sake: Yiddishisms: Yiddish Sayings (I also interviewed my relatives and wrote a book on my family history but that’s not for public consumption!); the first Antoine de St Exupery page; the first Albert Einstein page; the first Simpsons Quote page; the first Ogden Nash page; the first Francis Bacon page; the first site about my hometown Great Neck; my long-time game of finding words-in-other words; my favorite etymologies; my long-time favorite poem; my thoughts on wandering around; my game of trying to understand business-ese; the only guide to walking around NY’s ethnic neighborhoods; some ancient quotes that once influenced me; my cv; books that moved me; and pre-Facebook photos of me.

Won Gold Medal @ NY Math Fair

Childhood math nerd.

Performed Piano @ Carnegie Hall

Childhood piano freak.

Obsessed Over Learning How To Imitate Anyone’s Writing Style

In middle school, I read John & Abigail Adams’ collected letters and loved their epistolary style. So I found lots of pen-pals and wrote to them like this. I did this for years until I became quite good. Then I spent a decade doing the same but for other lots of other people’s styles.

Memorized (most of) the Dictionary

Starting when I was approximately 8 years old until late high school, I’d spend 2 hours every morning memorizing the dictionary (and its etymologies), before the school bus came. The trusty, unpretentious World Book Dictionary, of course.

Was Born, on 1/14

Don’t remember it well. But my dad looks great in this photo with me, taken generally around that time.

Great-Aunt Dies while Cooking Dinner… And Family Eats Dinner

Before I was born, the entire extended family mishpachah–everyone, very poor–all came to my great-aunt’s house for dinner every Sunday night, for decades. The weekly luxury. When she was in her 90s, she laid down her head while cooking the dinner, and died. The whole family arrived over the next hours, as scheduled. They ate the dinner. It’s what she would have wanted.

My Family Emigrates to NY… and All But One Return

Five poor brothers emigrated from Minsk, Belarus to NY. The great depression was so bad for them that four of them returned to Belarus. Those four were murdered (you know, that issue with Germany). The one who stayed in NY was my great-grandfather. Thanks for not moving back to Eastern Europe on the eve of Hitler and Stalin, G-Gramps!

Great-Grandfather Sends for Wife… And Gets Her Sister

My great-grandfather emigrated from “Minsk Gubernia” to NY. Saved money, sent enough back to send for his wife… and the ship arrived, and his wife’s sister stepped off. Wife died and she took her place. She ended up being my great-grandma! Love those traditions.

Possibly-Related Morgan Robertson Wrote The Titan

Similarities of the rôles as well as the first and family names between myself and Morgan Robertson have led to widespread speculation that we may be related. On the face of it, we’re unlikely related (he’s unlikely Ashkenaz!) but speculation is fun. “The Other Morgan” in 1912 wrote The Wreck of the Titan: Or, Futility about a ship named the Titan that was full of elites without enough lifeboats that hit an iceberg and sunk on an April night–14 years before the famous “Titanic” event.

Ashkenaz in White Russia, But Originally Phoenician

23andme tells me I’m 100% Ashkenazi via Minsk/Belarus, supporting evidence for the family lore that we were rabbis for generations. 23andme has not been able to confirm the other family lore, that before that we were possibly plainly purple-loving Phoenician peasants.

Y-chromosomal Adam: My Original Human Ancestor

My story begins with my first known ancestor, for the human part of my DNA, was Y Chromosomal Adam. He’s the first “anatomically modern human,” as the evolutionary-biologists call them: the one man whom science has taught us that I’m descended from. And all other modern humans, too.

My Reptilian Ancestors… Maybe

They say, in our family lore, that 1,165,000 years ago our family’s distant ancestors were reptiles and thus we still have some trace of reptilian DNA in us. 23andme confirmed I do have some non-human Neanderthal DNA in me, at least. Who knows if the reptilian story–a bubbe-meise, as my grandma called them–is true or not. If I had to bet, I’d guess the chance that this is accurate would be about 0.00298347%.